From Cradle,to Grave

We believe life is beautiful. Aha! Wait a minute,not really!

Life is complicated and full of disappointments. Speaking from personal experience. And I suppose you all agree on that too. Life isn't easy as it seems. A perfect life is only for movies and some books. But reality is far different.

Its like you don't find the matching shoes at the mall,and if you do,its pricey;or maybe you miss the bus and get late to work;or get bad grades in your paper,your boyfriend breaks up with you,you look fatter than the girl next door,the list goes on and on.

Our life is full of disappointments but at the end of the day when you are back home to your family,your father,mother,brother,sister,and when they support you at your downfall,a pat or two when you do something good,when your relatives and family stand by you at the time when you need them the most,when they tell you,its going to be okay,then all the day's disappointments start to fade away. You pull yourself up to face the challenges head on. As said by someone,"When all else fails,there's family!" Its sure helps to keep you going.

But what if all that you believe one day turns out to be false? What if your family is the one to disappoint you? What if they are the one to turn your faith and belief into nothing?

What would you do?

We would fail as a person,we would question our identity,where and to whom we belonged when we were just born. There would be no hope and no reason or meaning to our living. We would be just all alone.

I'm talking here about honor killing.A big,horrible blotch on our society and truly the "false" honor that each of us are so proud of leads to it.

How would you feel if someone's pointing a gun at your loved one? You would be dead scared. And how would you feel,if the person pointing the gun,is a person from your family,whom you love equally?

Personally,I would be paranoid,not knowing what to do. The only thing screening through my mind would be to give up my life instead of being witness to the killing of my loved one.

Now,imagine what the person suffers through who have actually witnessed it! So many cases in India,some come to light and some don't.Cases like Manoj-Babli,2007;Nidhi-Dharmendra,2002;Shafilea Ahmed Case;so-called "mystery" case of Arushi Talwars.The list is on and on...

I somewhere read,"There is no 'honor' in honor killing" and I'm totally inclined to agree with it.Its just a ruthless murder,as simple as that and should be treated likewise.Nothing can justify murder no matter what the reason is behind it.Nobody has the right to end another life whether its even your parents.

Detective Superintendent Geraint Jones (from Shafilea Ahmed Case) said while explaining the reason for his sentencing:

"Over the years, many people have asked me-is this a so-called honor killing? For me, it's a simple case of murder. This is a case of domestic abuse by two parents towards their children. Domestic abuse is, sadly, something which the police have to deal with too often. It transcends culture, class, race, and religion."

One of our Indian Court also remarked:

Honor killing seems to be spreading its tentacles in certain sections of the society. It connotes a certain mindset, that the chastity of the girl belongs to her family. This is a dangerous trend which is not only to be deprecated but a holistic effort is to be made by all sections of the society to eliminate it completely, "

I agree to both here,it 'transcends culture, class, race and religion' and we must 'eliminate it completely'.What we need is to widen our psychological and cultural point of view or saying and bringing up all these will be total pointless! We must kill the thought and that is what is going to bring the real change.
But,I wonder,will it ever spill out of our minds out into the sewers of a dark ugly past?

The Present Face of Our Society

Our country,India is considered a developing nation.But do you really believe it holds true? If you ask me,in my opinion I don't think so! The scenario of our present 'so called developing' India is same as it was before.

I am not a critic,but a simple girl and out of the million Indians my judgement for sure would hardly matter,yet I'm here trying to make a point on something that is equally crucial as our country's social,political,economic and cultural realm.

When India has tremendously raised its standards in other aspects it still lacks the progress in educating a girl child.A girl is still considered inferior to a boy even if the girl is way more competent.Survey shows that more than 10 million girls are illiterate and up to 12 million girl fetuses are aborted in 30 years.

Girls are forbidden from receiving education in many backward areas and prevalence of early marriage is continuously practiced.The irony,is our society grand fully celebrates worshiping of Goddess Durga,Kali,Laxmi and even the deity of education Goddess Saraswati,yet when it comes to a girl child they forget to provide them whats rightfully theirs.

Gandhiji said,“If you educate a man,you educate an individual,but if you educate a woman,you educate an entire family”.But has his saying being actually followed?

Even if some upper-class families do provide the privilege but with a fixed mindset that their education is not considered important,because at the end of it a girl is supposed to be married and expected to limit herself to her household chores and family.

Recent reports shows consistent problems like female infanticide,dowry,female suicides,domestic battering,malnutrition of women,etc.And our constitution does have laws and acts enacted for each one of them,even the media plays a huge role making tall claims about women empowerment through television commercials,shows or newspapers.But has anything 'drastically' changed?

NGOs have opened schools for free education but are there enough infrastructure? Does all of them fulfill the basic standards? Are they properly equipped? Are all children actually sent to schools?

A bulk load questions without any proper answer!

Education is everyone's right irrespective of gender.Is it too much to give a child? We provide food and clothing then why not education?

The root cause to crimes like rape,molestation,exploitation and eve-teasing is gender inequality.Where boys are taught they are superior and girls are mere nothings,what do you expect to come out of it? Enactment of law isn't enough,the only way to eradicate most of the problems is proper education of girls and women,teaching them to be equals.

Its high time to bring in a positive change and widen our perspective towards actual attainment of urbanization and modernization.

My question,specially to all those parents who consider a girl to be nothing but a burden,"if a girl can reach the stars,then why must she settle for bare pebbles?"

Fine Lines

Most things in life are about the fine lines. There is fine line between a treat and over-indulgence (*I'm thinking of a piece of a cake versus the whole chocolate cake*).There is certainly fine line between judging others and setting someone straight...

Motherhood is all about these fine lines...there is a thin sensitive relation between the mother and her baby...in fact biologically mother and a baby is connected with a fine line of tissues but sensually the relation is much deeper. A mother always knows the need of a baby when it is in the womb or as a grown up. She always feels the pain her child is going through and does every possible thing to keep them safe.

They are the only ones who literally prove ‘a bond till the end of the world’ completely true. Today, I was missing Mum a lot, she has been away for a while now and my heart cried out for her. I don’t want to sound dramatic but really, the absence of her is starting to dawn on me. Talking to her over and over doesn't seem to be simply enough.

I wish if only, I could explain it to her but I’m really bad at expressing anything at all. At times, on a second thought I think assume maybe she already knows and I don’t have to say it loud. But a pessimist like me always considers the ‘not so bright’ side of everything, so it saddens me to think what if she doesn't know. As a result, bulk loads of insecurities cloud over choking all my senses. Three months! Without her being around, maybe that’s my fine line between continuing to be sane and getting insane.

Sometimes, the thought of her not being around kills me. How eyes are so dear to a blind, likewise she is the oxygen pumping in my heart.

For now, yes! I’m upset but I hope to soon reunite with her in months to come.

*Fingers crossed!*